Fashion has a new dictionary. Well, a new chapter at least. Garments that have come together, got a little festive off the punch, got knocked up Bristol Palin style and had a illegitimate lovechild. This new breed of garment is called a 'Fusion' (or Con-fusion depending on how you look at it) whereby two garments are mashed together, taking the best features of each to make a 'new' one.
Call me old fashioned....but I like a garment to do one thing and do it well.
Take the Shacket for instance. It's a shirt. It's a Jacket...It's a shacket... Even the description sounds somewhat infomercial gimmicky and don't even get me started on its portmanteau (fusion of two words to one)...sure its the perfect balance of Shirt and Jacket but it ends up sounding like expletives that could also describe the fusion.
But back to being old fashioned, is a 'shacket' just a shirt with a zip or a light jacket with a shirt collar? is the glass half empty or full? you decide...
So in an age when we are L.O.L'ing and O.M.G'ing is the portmanteau just another SMS version of shorthand or are these items of clothing the new half breeds.
Regardless, they are here, they are on the racks and they are selling. Here are some of the more popular ones
BLIRT: Blouse + Skirt a blouse and skirt combination all in one... this baffles me. Isn't it essentially a colour blocked dress?
JORTS: Jeans+ shorts
This was the only picture I could find that didn't show a 90's frat boy or a father wearing them in the most unflattering manner. Approach with caution. Do not approach.
MANDALS: Man + Sandals
Jesus like sandals for men. This one can go either way. Either in a high fashion way paired with the right summer outfit...Yes... or in the other way... worn with Jorts and a polo...No
MUBE/ TUBAXI: Tube dress+Maxi
A tube top that extends into a maxi dress style. Approach with care, this one requires height (the higher the shoes the better) and no cellulite or alternatively, the heaviest duty spanx you can find. Being a model helps. These style of dresses are usually made in an unforgiving Jersey/spandex therefore consult a mirror before leaving the house...and dont eat.
MURSE: Man+ purse.
I personally hate this one, mainly because it has broadly labelled as any bag that a man carries....Wrong.
Its all about proportions people. Being naturally larger, men should carry something with a bit of size about it. Anything smaller than an A4 book falls into the Murse category mainly because it can be tucked under the arm, much like the female counterpart the Purse...Which is a no.
TREGGINGS: Trousers + Leggings
JEGGINGS: Jeans + Leggings
PLEGGINGS: Pants + Leggings
This could be a whole chapter. Basically, leggings, which, do not stand up to being worn independently due to the informality of the waistband etc, have been mashed together with the much needed formal features of the pant/jean/trouser to form a pseudo pant. They have come a long way since their debut but still require careful wear. If it looks like you are wearing half a scuba suit, its probably wise to hang this hybrid up. Choose carefully as some styles still hang dangerously on the legging side of things. The more features of the pant they have the better. They can look good when teamed with heels and a longer style shirt or tunic.
SHACKET: Shirt + Jacket
A Shirt in a heavier style of fabric that can be worn independently or over another garment. It can be zip or button front and can sometimes have a hood. Great for tran-seasonal weather....I'm sorry....but is anyone else just seeing a lightweight jacket? no?
SHANTS- sheer + pants
Another one to approach with care. You want these somewhat tailored, the last thing you want is to look like an extra at a 'I Dream of Jeanie' convention.
SKORT: Skirt + Shorts
Shorts that have a panel of fabric across the front to give the illusion of a skirt. Ladies, I give you permission for these if you play one of the following sports- Tennis, Hockey or golf. Any non-sport related use is a no.
SHOOTIE: shoe + boot
The heel of a shoe and the ankle hugging closeness of a boot. Again, careful if you have shorter legs, you don't want your leg to be cut at the ankle. If you are shorter, look for a pair that is close around the back of the ankle and open through the front so as to keep your leg line going as far as possible.
SNOOD- Scarfe+hoodie
Just because the word hoodie is used in the portmanteau, does not mean it should be worn as such. Essentially it is a looped scarf that can be used as a hood if necessary... However you do run the risk of looking like a Marrakesh market woman selling dates and figs if you do...
TANKINI: Binkini + Tank
A Bikini with a longer, more modest tank style top. Perfect for those who are conscious about their midriffs and sun protection.
WHORTS/ WINTORTS: Winter + Shorts
A style of short, often in a thicker fabric and paired with tights for the winter months. You might want to live somewhere that has a relatively mild winter to pull this off. Again, its name sounds kind of sounds like an insult.
